We first met La Señora in Ye Gods! She takes center stage in the Un-familiar as she races to find the missing Carmen del Toro, her successor, before it's too late. |
¿Como esta, Señora Milagros?
How do you think I am? I'm going
through the change and I'm not ready.
That's a rather, um, personal problem isn't it, Señora?
It's going to be a global problem if
I don't find Carmen.
What does Carmen have to do with your menopause?
Menopause? What they hell makes you
think I'm going through menopause? I'm going through the change--the BIG one,
not mere menopause.
Um, maybe you could clarify that for my readers, if you don't mind.
What's the problem? Did you not read Ye
Gods!? You do know I'm a familiar, right? And all those stupid folk tales
and fairy tales messed everything up. Familiars don't help witches, they help
gods. Although, I can see where the confusion came from since gods do sometimes
seem to use magic--although they don't, mind you. Gods are subject to the same
physical and chemical laws of nature as everything else in the universe,
they're just better at manipulating the elements. Like the gods, familiars selected their own earthly bodies. We know how important physical appearance—and the perception of it—are in exerting influence over our respective gods. Because of that, most familiars take the form of a cat. Even gods can't stay arrogant in the presence of a cat. I, however, chose a human. My god, known to most humans as the chupacabra, is a servant of the animals and as such, has a great ability to manipulate them, pull at their heartstrings, so to speak, so I chose to remain in human form when I became a familiar. But now that I'm ready to retire, I'll become a cat. That's the change I'm talking about. I'll live out my remaining days as the doted upon pet of my successor, Carmen.
Sra Milagros' retirement plan as Fifi. |
Well, that sounds pretty good to me. Most people look forward to their retirement and having more leisure time, so what's the problem?
Carmen is missing. My very last duty to the god is to ensure he bonds with his new familiar. They have to be in each other's presence to do. I have to find both of them and get them together before I turn into Fifi.
Honestly, Senora, you don't look a day over fifty. You can't possibly
be ready to retire. How old are you?
Fifty? Get your eyes checked. This is
the body of a forty-year-old, forty-five tops. And I can't believe you're
really going to ask me that. But, let me see...I became a familiar in...1850, when
I was 33. I remember that because El Jibaro by Manuel Alonso had just
come out not long before. That means I was born in...1817, so while I've been
around for one hundred and ninety-seven human years, I've only been an active
familiar for forty-nine years. We go dormant when our gods fade, you know. I
don't count those years, so that makes me eighty-two, eighty-three next month.
Wow! You're pretty spry for 82.
Hibernating for 114
out of 197 years will keep you young.This is who will play Sra Milagros in the movies. (photo from wallalay.com) |
Does your retirement mean we won't see you in book 3 of the chupacabra series?
You're the author, you should know that. But, for what it's worth, my plan is to complete my change to Fifi, curl up on a nice pillow in the sun and ignore all the crazy shenanigans. Whether or not you'll let me enjoy my retirement in book 3 (tentatively titled, Ye Goddess!) is yet to be seen. If you'd hurry up and finish book 2 (The Un-familiar) we could all find out that much sooner, couldn't we?
Reading this makes me want to pick up a conga and dance a merengue. Pass the Bacardi and the fried platanos and let's salsa the night away. Oye Gloria, no has visto nada todavía!!
ReplyDeleteOye como va
ReplyDeleteMi ritmo
Bueno pa' gozar
Mulata..........
Maybe Carlos Santana could do the theme song and soundtrack for the movie? : )
ReplyDelete